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a lost civil engineering student ! help, advice

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i really don't know where to start,,, im in my forth year of civil engineering while i dropped two courses because i was afraid to get dismissed because of my law GPA so it means that i only finished 3 years of engineering but i failed a lot where im still in level two courses i have a 2.2 GPA and only 50 credit passed out of my 138 BS'c in civil engineering credit after i finished high school i got a full scholarship to my current university and lost it in my 3rd year now im considering changing my major into English let(english isn't my mother language ) my family always been so supportive and just want me to study ,and i had to lie often to hide all my screw-ups i really feel guilty and depressed ,my mother told me finish engineering even if took you 8 years it doesn't matter but i feel i wont be able to continue even if i want to i failed in so many courses i missed many finals i skipped many classes and for that i know im not such a typical responsible student ,what about engineering student! regarding all that at this stage i want to save myself and get a degree im not sure if my problem is with my major which i obviously don't like or its just me im afraid even after i change i will have the same issues i dont know if there is a chance for me to continue engineering or any other major i already wasted 4 years now im a 22 years old without a degree i tried working in a contracting company thought that will help me to love my major and be good at it i was good in my job and got paid good but it was all the same for my studies i feel sorry for myself and my family because they really believed in my and i didn't now i only have one month even less to decide what to do my mother wants me to continue and just start working hard i want to have a new start to hide all my screw_ups(i love reading and writing poems) so its one month to decide what to do with my life ! im in a stage in my life where im completely lost and i only want to save myself and i want to change before I've never used to settle for secondaries options but at this stage i think i should accept the least where my chances are..!!!!

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